Three years ago on this day, a light was abruptly diminished from this world.
That light was my beautiful cousin and she was gone without preparation or warning from this earth. I’ll never forget that day because it was so unexpected.
I felt many things; extreme sadness that she was gone, grief for her immediate family who loved her so dearly and for all the time that I could never make up in getting to know her better.
She was a few years older than I and we grew up in different states. She was a brilliant artist/graphic designer who had a love for the arts and a passion for music that I often thought might even exceed my own.
A number of years back, and I don’t quite remember how it happened, we started and on-again-off-again email correspondence in which we shared film soundtrack suggestions with each other. She would send me suggestions and I would investigate them and I would do the same in kind to her. It was fun to see what we already had in common and to learn about new things from each other. Sadly, I did not keep up as well as I should have and the emails gradually died off between us.
Somewhat randomly, though I believe it was God, a little bit before she passed we started to chat briefly about soundtracks again on Facebook Messenger. I really should dive backwards into my messages and see what brought it about. But I will never forget that the final soundtrack I shared with her, just months before her passing… It was the soundtrack to the movie “Beautiful Creatures”. I love it for many reasons but the main one was it doesn’t conform to the typical sound of other film music. It’s a little indie pop, a little orchestral and a lot of awesome… and something inside me knew that my cousin would appreciate it too.
I still think of her often and find myself wishing that a younger me hadn’t put off keeping those conversations alive. Part of me will likely always regret that. But the other part of me is thankful for the time we did have. She was an amazing, talented, smart and incredibly witty person. The world deserved to know her better. But I’m thankful that the heavens do; I know she’s up there watching down…and likely painting on the canvas of the stars. That brings a much needed smile.
I’m ending this post with the song I wrote in her honor when she passed. Words absolutely failed and I often find music will speak for me when I cannot find the words.
All my love, C. May your light continue to shine brightly down on us, somewhere beyond the stars. ❤